I’ve made some passing references to major neck pains, and a few people have written to ask me about it. I’ve had chronic back problems my entire life.
I’ve played violin since I was six years old, and the violin is really an instrument that forces you to crick your neck to one side, and twist your entire body in an unnatural, asymmetrical pose. I literally remember being seven years old and already having back problems.
I broke my neck when I was 14, in a snowboarding accident. Not a major break at all – I chipped a vertebra in my neck and had to wear a squishy brace for a week or so, but I still had decent mobility. SInce then, my neck acts up on occasion.
And I clench my jaw. I have TMJ – sometimes I can’t open my mouth enough for a slice of pizza! The real truth is that I’m an incredibly tense person. I hold my tension in my skin. I’ve had people wrap an arm around my waist and ask me why I’m flexing my back and stomach muscles. I am a high energy, high stress, passionate fury of a person, and it takes its toll on me.
I don’t really realize how high strung I am most of the time. But today, talking to my massage therapist, I saw the absolute contrast in our attitude in energy. He was so calm and slow and collected, speaks slowly, methodically. I talk like a chipmunk on speed. I’m a fucking tornado. I need to calm the fuck down.
……The massage was good. My neck feels a lot better. I can actually turn my head in both directions which is a nice change. I spent a while in the steam room after the massage, feeling like the air might drown me. It really is nice to have the time and space to relax. I need it.
But I still feel something wrong beneath the surface. And my neck still makes clicking noises when I turn it. So I think I’m going to call my friend’s chiropractor, but I may also just schedule a second massage next sunday.
Tagged: , me , 365days , massage , diptych , black and white , Before / After , Right now I am babysitting for a college friend. , I used to nanny her daughter when she was a baby and my friend had labs to attend. , I remember her baby shower. , And now she has two kids who are beautiful……and the baby I used to watch? Is seven! , 365 – Take Two